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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 11, Meet Your Angels

I don’t know nearly all there is to know about angels, but I do know for sure that we have a mighty number of angels looking out for us every day.  Take a moment to acknowledge your angels and all that they do for you every day.  Welcome them into your life.  You’ll never look back.

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 10, Spread the Love

I’m a big fan of expressing gratitude — thank you notes, texts, emails.  This idea is one I want to do but haven’t done yet.  The basic idea comes from Shawn Achor.  During his interview with Oprah, he mentioned a couple of simple happiness practices that imprMahaloove overall happiness if practiced daily for at least 21 days.  One of those is writing a one-line thank-you each day.

I do want to do that!

But today, what I am suggesting is a version of that:

Write one thank-you note to someone who helped you and to whom you have not expressed either your appreciation, the full extent of your appreciation, or the extent of their positive impact on your life.

Write one more thank-you note to someone who initially affected you negatively but whose actions ultimately were beneficial to you.  You turned lemons into lemonade.  You learned a lesson the hard way.  Whatever it may be.

You needn’t send either note, of course, I only suggest that you write it.  Then ‘send’ it off however you wish–with a prayer, a little fire.

But most of all, just hold it and enjoy it in your heart.  Acknowledge it, and know that you have, can, and will do the same for someone else.

 

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 9, Your Life Purpose

HiddenSymmetryBirthdays
Birthdate Chart for determining your 3 numbers — the last number is the one that contains info on your life purpose

All you need is your birthdate to know your life purpose?!

I heard an interesting radio show that led me to a book called, “Your Hidden Symmetry,” which I first borrowed from the library then purchased on iBooks [$9.99].  It’s also available at Amazon.

This book has been so helpful to me in the short time I’ve owned it.

If you have wondered about your purpose in life, this is a helpful book.If you are determined to fulfill your life purpose or frustrated because you cannot figure out your life purpose, this is an incredibly helpful book.  Even as a parent, this book was very helpful to me in knowing whether we had or how we could encourage our children along their life paths.

When you do lay your hands on the book, find your 3rd number and look it up in the relevant chapter.  That’s where you’ll see your life summed-up on 2-3 pages!

If you are nodding your head, nodding your head, and then completely befuddled by your actual life purpose, chances are that you really had no idea what your life purpose was.  This is a guiding light for you.

If you are reading about your 3rd number and nodding your head and then keep nodding your head, or opening your eyes wide and saying, “Oh, that’s why!” or other such responses to your experience and efforts being validated, chances are you already are on your path.

Either way, the information is extremely useful in my experience–but then again, fulfilling our life purposes is a really big deal to me.

And by the way, one’s life purpose can be achieved either in a career or outside of it.

Cover and the portion of the Table of Contents pertaining to Life Purpose
Cover and the portion of the Table of Contents pertaining to Life Purpose

There’s way more in the book, and all of it can help you figure out what your major challenges are and your strengths too.  Where you go in times of stress and some tools or alternatives that will be more helpful to you.  It can help you understand why everything has seemed so hard or why you start a lot of projects but finish a few. It can even help you understand the lessons that you are supposed to be learning so that you can embrace them quickly when they come along or recognize new opportunities to learn [hopefully through joy!].

As an example, I was just talking to someone whose 3rd number indicates that her life purpose is around appreciating and teaching others how to appreciate beauty and, specifically, the beauty of the moment.  At the moment, she is going through a major transition in her life and has felt that the lesson was all about trust.  But what if it is about staying in the moment?  I bet that would make it easier for her to do and learn, and it would push her further along her life path.  When I offered this to her, she felt that it brought greater clarity and can now stay more clearly in that centered place of trust and presence.  How beautiful is that?!  [And the ripple effect, in circles of light, will mean that more people will learn from her about staying in the present moment.]

Beginning summary of my life purpose.
Beginning summary of my life purpose.

Knowing your purpose helps you to keep this priority in mind, to recognize opportunities when you see them, and in my case, to feel more sure of the steps that I want to take.  For instance, people often tell me that I should write a book, a sort of memoir.  But I have few external credentials for being an author and think of memoirs as being of interest only for celebrities.  When I read that my life purpose is to release the wisdom in my bones, the wisdom of the ancestors that has been passed down, I felt more certain that I do have something to offer even without external credentials.

Ironically, my father has the same third number, as does my daughter and a friend of mine.  It manifests a bit differently in each of us, but it is interesting now to see, “Oh, that’s why we have these resonances.”

Looking at the life purpose of my eldest son has been very helpful, because his purpose is to change the world.  I gotta tell you, it isn’t easy raising a kid whose destiny is to change the world!  But we have tried very hard to support who he is, his interests, and to trust his path.  This book was an incredible validation for him and for us that his profound frustrations with “what is” are the basis for an incredible ability to help humanity.  But it also is a validation for the guidance that we have felt our son needed, informed perhaps a little more now.

For one more person who has been very successful in his career but also felt very lost in terms of knowing  his calling, his life purpose, this book was a big eye-opener.  The other descriptions were so exactly right, it was remarkable.  Then we get to the life purpose section of the 3rd number and see that some of it resonates but it is actually quite distant from his actual work.  We can see hints of relevant interests, career desires, etc., but he is so far from

So I do hope that you will find it at your local library, borrow it, get a copy for yourself, or maybe call in to that radio show for a live reading.

I’d love to hear your stories, too!  Meanwhile, enjoy!

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 8, Students of Joy

I took for granted the notion that learning always came through hardship, that gain came through pain.  So I was very much caught by surprise when I heard the suggestion that we learn through joy.

But when I started thinking about it, I realized it is possible.  It doesn’t mean there isn’t hard work involved — joy and hard work can be simultaneous!

I propose it now to you … in those moments of joy, of pleasure, of fulfillment, of contentment, know your happiness, revel in it, and seek more of it.

Know what feels right, know your path, stay in God’s light, and learn from doing what feels right.

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 7, Forget Forgiving

Forgiving is a beautiful choice when you can make it, but I think that we have a lot of baggage associated with the word, the concept, and the action.  There are so many definitions of what it means to forgive–and what it does not mean to forgive.  I just barely use the word any more.

So, when I feel wronged now–and I’ve thrown my fair share of pity parties!–this is pretty much how I handle it:

I often shield myself if I still feel vulnerable.  Otherwise, I simply remind myself of my connection to God.  [Using the Protect & Ground method described on this post.]

I sometimes follow this with various ideas of why the person might have acted that way, trying to accept that a person simply may not have the resources to have behaved better.  I also look at my responsibility in the matter and what I could have done differently.

So, for instance, yesterday a child pointed at my daughter and laughed, nudging her friends to join in.  Is this because my daughter has wronged her by having difficulty with walking and moving her body?  No, most likely it is because the girl has seen or experienced being teased for being different.  In a certain way, mocking others is a protection for her.

Here’s another example.  I write an email to someone and don’t hear back.  Is it because I’ve offended her or because she simply didn’t have the time/thoughts/space to respond?

Oprah opened my eyes to this, actually.  She was talking about a scenario like this with Sarah Ferguson–that Ms. Ferguson assumed a non-response meant she’d done something wrong.  But Oprah said, “It’s not always about you!”  I found that shocking and offensive until Oprah explained that sometimes there are other things going on in a person’s life that interfere with or interrupt what otherwise might occur in a relationship.  Good point!  It isn’t always about me [or you]!

Then I pray for the other.  The first time that I undertook this, it was really hard!  Someone had been deeply hurtful to us for many years.  We committed to a daily prayer for one month for her, and we could hardly think of anything to say.  I literally posted on a Facebook page asking for help.  Someone–a stranger–suggested that we pray that the person be lifted up out of fear.  That made sense, that fear is basically the basis of harmful choices [including the overdose given to my daughter, BTW!].  So we started there — that the person be lifted up out of fear and eventually added that she would be able to open her heart.

My go-to prayer, then, is something like this, “God, please lift this person up out of fear and open her heart so that she might fully know the joy and love of Your presence in her life.”

Finally, sometimes we need this prayer for ourselves!

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 6, Stretch

I have found that a little bit of stretching is beneficial to body, mind, and spirit.

Stretch Your Body:  Stretching before we get out of bed is actually good for us!  Before I get out of bed, I spend a moment to bring God into my heart.  I like to follow that up with a Sun Salutation.  [Here’s one that is longer than the one I learned.]

At the end of the Salutation, I say a prayer asking that God light my path and help me to serve Him in all that I do and all that I say.

It is helpful to stretch throughout the day, as well.  The Mindful Moon app sometimes includes that suggestion, or you could add it to your list of beneficial alternatives to anything you are doing that is unhelpful to you.

Stretch Your Mind:  Constantly learning stretches the mind.  For me, it’s more than just factual knowledge.  Stretching the mind can be about stretching the heart.  Keep an open mind, keep an open heart, and that helps me to stay free of judgment.

Stretch Your Spirit:  Some years ago, I got stuck in a place where I felt I couldn’t take my kids to the playground by myself safely.  After reading a synopsis of Cheryl Strayed’s book, Wild, I took a concept from it…Just put one foot in front of the other.  It’s a bit like staying in the moment.

Just stretch your comfort zone a little tiny bit.

So I figured out two small playgrounds that were enclosed and where I could park nearby–that way I could keep a good eye on my young toddler and his shenanigans with his much older [but helpfully safety-minded] older brother while helping his older sister move her body.  With the car right there, I had a safety net nearby.  I decided we’d stay for only 45 minutes so that I wouldn’t max-out [in body, mind, or spirit].  It was incredibly liberating for all of us.

 

Before I sign-off, remember to be safe — even stretching sometimes needs medical clearance, so check with your doctor first.  And make sure you stretch your spirit safely too!

 

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 5, Rainbows and Dragonflies

If you are into personal growth like I am, and I suspect that you are if you are reading this, you might have fallen into the dreaded Forward Trap.  I tend to look so much at what I want yet to accomplish, what I haven’t yet mastered, that everything I have done quickly becomes water under the bridge.  My set point rises each time I accomplish something and that becomes my new neutral.  I think it’s also known as [or at least related to] perfectionism.

So my suggestion today is to stop and look backward.

Look at the difficulties that you have overcome.

Look at the stuff people said you could never do that you did do.

Look at the where’s, the when’s, the how’s and celebrate them.

Celebrate you and let someone know about it.  Proclaim it, stand strong not just in who you are but in how far you have come on your path.  You’ve seen your path lit brightly before you.  Now look back and see how you found paths of light time and again.

Now you are and can be a beacon of light for others who are being told right now that what they want is impossible — healing, success, a change of circumstances, a change of heart.  Know that it was possible for you and you chose to make it happen, even to let it happen.  And know that it is possible for others who might find your beacon light and be inspired in their own ways for their own lives.

You are the rainbow and the dragonfly.  You are the special treat God gave to the world.

Be it, know it, shine it.

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 4, Reset

Years ago, I realized that when I said that I didn’t have time to do something, I was creating a false reality.  There is time, it is just a matter of priorities.  Do I watch TV or do ___?  Do I do the dishes or ____?  Do I spend time with the kids of ___?  Do I sleep or ____?  Shower or ____?  Eat or ____?  Cook or ____?  Hang-out on Facebook or ___?

There are time-sucks in our lives, indulgences, vices, and worst of all, distractions from our real work here.

It is the latter in which I am most interested, mainly because I have the rest mostly under control.  But this trick likely would work in some form or another for other ineffectual uses of time.  And I feel that time is really the most precious resource we have, because we need health for more and better time, time for family connection, time to fulfill our life purpose.  In a lot of ways, it all comes down to time.

So think about what it is that you want to do with your life right now that you are not doing.  Do you want to exercise?  Reduce consumption of unhealthy foods and drinks?  Spend more time with family?  Say ‘thank you’ more often?  Volunteer?  Pray?

Write down at least the top 3 things that you most want to do in your life.  I like to put them on a sticky note then take a photo of them.

Then consider what it is that you do that keeps you from doing something more beneficial with your time.

Where and when do you do it?  Why do you do it?

And I am not saying that all time has to be used with what we consider ‘honorable’ pursuits.  I think that well-chosen games, television, movies, reading, sitting with a cup of tea can all be very good uses of time.  So look at the time you use where you feel, at the end, like you are no better afterwards for having done it than you were beforehand.

You can say a prayer about it, asking for help using your time more purposefully.  You can ask for help with removing any fears you have about using your time more purposefully [sometimes we are afraid of failing at the thing we really want to do, for instance, so we occupy our time with other activities and tasks instead].  Or sometimes we do a lot of reading and listening but not a lot of putting into action.  So acknowledge to yourself, then ask for help if it resonates, and when you are ready, take some action.

You can take steps to reduce the likelihood of engaging in the distraction — take the distracting game off of your phone or computer.  Put the book someplace where you can read it but then put it down and put what you read to good use.  Or put in place the items that would help you do what you most want to do — thank-you cards where you normally distract yourself with something else, an exercise regimen at the kitchen island, a journal by your bedside.

Or the Top 3  sticky note can easily be duplicated and put in the places where you are most likely to drain your time.  You can take a photo of the sticky note and put it on your lock screen or computer screensaver.  Use it as a reminder that there are things you want to accomplish in your life, in your time here, in this moment right now.  Remember that anything you want to accomplish has a component that can be done in a short space of time.  Even exercise can be done in short spurts at home [there are programs out there for that!].  The next time you choose, you will be able to choose more consciously.

Ummm … now I’ve gotta go find a sticky note!

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 3, Fearless

Fear is occasionally very useful–it informs us when we are not safe and activates us to gain safety.

Thank you  for the gift of fear showing up when I need it and keeping me safe.  

When fears show up as anxiety, however, or worries arise at an inopportune time [during sleep, for instance], they can get in the way.  They also can be so long-held or so deep that they act as obstacles to us on the path of life.

For a quick fix to fretting, I have a few little tools I’d like to share:

Ask for Help:  Pray for help removing all unnecessary and unhelpful fears or worries from my mind and from my heart.  If you are looking at deeper, longer-held fears, you can change or add words like, “detrimental” or “self-destructive” — whatever seems right to you.

I sometimes visualize fears being swept or scraped away, too, and I ask that they are transmuted into their light form.

Re-schedule It:  If a thought remains after you have said this prayer and received God’s relief, you could try writing down the worry.  If it is the middle of the night, I roll up the worry / concern / to-do item in a ball and throw it into a time the following day when I can attend to it.  Sometimes I also ask for help from Above with remembering what to do or with how best to resolve the issue.

EFT:  EFT can be surprisingly effective, especially when you know exactly what you need to ease.  So if you are fretting about something specific, you can do EFT on that.  I’ve also done EFT using  “fear” effectively in the middle of the night.

Grounding, lavender oil, and Brazilian Toe Massage all can be helpful too.

Of course, I should add that for more chronic anxiety and susceptibility to stress, constitutional homeopathy can be a wonder.

Here is to being Fearless!

 

 

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21 Days of Fantastic: Day 2, Hope

When life is looking bleak and hope is hard to find, try this little trick.  It’s a compilation of a few separate practices.

Surround yourself with the white light of God.  Know that it comes from God and you come from it.

Feel the love holding you up.

Feel the love protecting you from all negativity and darkness until you know that you are with God and God is with you.

Let God raise you up out of fear and into hope with His love.

Enjoy that feeling, revel in it, welcome it, open yourself unto it completely.

We are alight in God’s love.  And we all are here to shine our lights.

Shine yours from within, and ask God to light your way forward.

See a path of light unfolding before you.  Your light, your path.